Tit for Tat

Next week are the Pennsylvania Presidential Primaries... with a large number of delegates up for grabs. You know what this means... right? Well, for one thing, it means the potential for lots of nasty television commercials and survey calls. For another thing -- it means that I will get to practice at least some of the questions I made up last June for the blog post entitled "Unknown Caller".

The more I think of it now, I am so hoping that I do get annoying survey calls from real people, not just robo calls.  I anticipate that this tit for tat process could be fun. Picture this...

Caller:  I have a few important survey questions.  It won't take much of your time.  Would you be able to answer them?

Me:  Certainly,  I just need to finish this bite of my dinner ... and ... I do need you to answer a few questions of my own first.  Surely you wouldn't mind.... It won't take much of your time and then we can get to your questions.  

• How are you? Are you having a good day? Do you find that most people are nice to you on the phone? Or...?
• Assuming that you are not a volunteer and are not incarcerated -- do you get paid well for doing these surveys?  Do you earn under or over minimum wage? What is minimum wage in your state?  What state is that? In general, how do you feel about your pay on a scale from 1 - 5 with 5 indicating that you are totally satisfied?
• If paid, do you get paid by the number of people you call or by the number of completed surveys? Do they deduct pay when people hang up on you? Are your feelings hurt when people do so?
• What company or political party are you really working for?  Are you sitting in a back room of the White House right now? Does your boss have a Southern tinge of Texas, Midwestern, New York Cityish, or New Englandish accent?
• What is your highest level of education? How old are you? Really? You sound younger.
• Do you have other jobs, or is this full time?
• Do you own your own home? 
• Do you live in the city or in the boonies?
• What would you be doing if you were not doing this survey?
• Do you have any idea of what time zone you are calling?  Do you care?
• Are you planning on buying a new car within the next 5 years? If so what make/model do you think it will be? Will you buy it new or used?
• How did you get my phone number? Did you have to pay for it? How much did it cost?
• Have I brightened your day?

Feel free to use any of my questions if you wish to play as well. Do let me know if you make any new friends or if someone hangs up on you.