Should I be insulted?

 

About a month ago I received an email from Ancestry.com inviting me to take part in a survey about Physical Features. I saved the email as a sort of mental “To Do Later” activity. I was curious to see about what all they were asking. They offered a preview of the types of questions asked in the survey.  The samples included questions on the shape of eyes and natural eyebrows, the directions of hair whorls, and fullness of eyebrows – in that order.  I wondered if they offered drawings or pictures you could look at to compare to your own characteristics or just word descriptors. I figured I would need a mirror as I really have no idea about my eyebrows, their fullness, or any hair whorls I might have (does that mean cowlicks?) – let alone the shape of my eyes.  I do not even know what shape my face is. I was curious, but delayed until a month later to open the survey.  It was early in the morning and I had “Less than 7 minutes” to spare. I was all excited about answering 30 questions about my physical features… maybe. I sensed some hesitation. Thought I would at least take a look. I mean – what is Ancestry.com going for here?  Like I said… I was curious.

Anyway... after struggling to see all the cowlicks on the back of my head – you know, to determine the direction of the hair whorls that I have been dealing with for my entire life -- and -- after taking a good long look at my eyebrows and eyes, I clicked on the Take the Survey button to find this:

        Sorry, you don’t qualify to take surveys at this time.

If you have questions about your eligibility, please contact our Member Services.

There was, of course the usual small box below that said Contact Us.

I opted not to do so and merely deleted the original email. After all -- I had other things to do with that 7 minutes that I had set aside for them. Then again ... why am I not qualified to take the survey at this time?  Would tomorrow be better?  How do they know that I am not qualified?  Why did they send me the email to take the survey in the first place if I am not qualified? Am I sorry that I once did the whole DNA thing with them? Perhaps. As I move along in "the journey", I find that I trust less and less... and wonder about stuff more and more.  I don't necessarily like that, but some lessons are hard learned, and I for one, have learned more than a few the hard way.

Should I feel insulted or relieved?  Really….  I only wanted to see what else they asked. I was curious to see what they are investigating.  I was hoping that I could figure out how my answers could help them "develop new traits and other DNA products". They said that was their goal. Hmm... Now I am even more curious.  

Back to the drawing board...

I noticed again the other day that some things are inevitable ... like the situation when the instructions you need to understand the most are the most poorly written.  Then again sometimes once you figure out instructions  -- after painful and tedious trial and error, you realize what they meant and wonder why you found them so difficult. Other times -- they are written in a language you once studied, but have now forgotten or in a language that you wonder how anyone can learn ever.  (Don't you "love" instructions that come in several languages and the English version seems to have been overlooked somehow?) Then ... the ultimate insult -- there are actually times when no instructions are included... not even an inaccurate drawing with arrows or numbers in little circles. The directions are simply nonexistent ... as in missing - no matter how many times you look in the shipping box. It is as annoying as when you are trying to put together something and the holes don't line up. Not all of today's ways are an improvement over the old. That is for sure.  Sometimes we are on our own. Then again...  human beings are resourceful and ingenious....

Personally I am thankful for all those total strangers who have posted "How To" videos on YouTube.  When I remember that this option is readily available, I have, without exception, found the help I needed. Again -- huge Thanks to anonymous people out there somewhere who share their knowledge so generously. Much appreciated. Technology can be a very good thing ... sometimes. When confronted with things that are difficult to sort out, we used to say, "Back to the drawing board"; now it is "Go to YouTube". It can be a good thing really - especially for those of us who find seeing the "how to do" helps us learn the "how to do".

I am always a little surprised to find that totally techno-resistant people still inhabit the planet and do so happily -- finding their way somehow pretty much like every generation before them . Maybe they are better off than those of us who at least try to keep up if only with a bit of the available technology. Trying  though can be exhausting. Sometimes it is like attempting to explain the Dewey Decimal System or the purpose of a card catalog to a Google protégé or to one who prefers an e-reader to an actual book  -- you know a real book -- the kind where the reader can flip pages easily --  backwards or forwards.  Once again... #old fart.

Poor horse... Lucky Grandfather...

 

There is nothing quite like getting caught off guard and finding yourself in uncontrollable laughter…. You know -- the kind that makes you wish you did not have a mouthful of coffee that could easily end up flying across the table or bursting out of your nose.  That is just what happened to me a few days ago. 

I was out to lunch with dear friends – all of whom I find to be uproariously funny so I should have been prepared, but ... was not.  And as I try to write about this moment, I dearly hope that it is not one of those situations where “you had to be there” to appreciate it. It would be so wonderful if you could share the fun.

Anyway – we were enjoying a hearty meal at The Pine Junction on Bailey Hill Road outside of Findley Lake or Sherman, NY depending on how you look at it (you need to go there), when a large group of “mature” women began to file in and seat themselves at several nearby tables. It was a case of older ladies travelling in packs. One of them, a most curious and perhaps a bit overly friendly individual, came over to our table to check on what we were all having for lunch. Anyway -- I found myself "people watching" and trying to imagine if they came on a bus or in several oversized vans and how they knew each other. They, by the way, have absolutely nothing to do with the story I am trying to tell you other than they were a momentary distraction.

Meanwhile the conversation at my table had continued without interruption and I had missed a great deal.  Suddenly my focus was pulled back onto my group and I heard bits and pieces of a story about a 90-year-old Grandfather, with Band-Aids or masking tape or something holding his glasses together, walking into a farm house kitchen complaining about his broken glasses and mentioning as a side story that the breakage had occurred when his horse was shot out from underneath him ... the bullet hitting the poor horse smack dab in the middle of the forehead. Say What? Now my attention was back for sure. It seems that the 90-year-old Grandfather, however, was less concerned about his horse or about how he, himself, might have been shot than he was about his broken glasses. In fact he was "madder than a wet hen".  Oh, how I wish you could have seen the facial expressions of the person who was narrating this story.  Now -- for some reason --I found this whole thing to be hysterically funny as I pictured the whole thing in my head and began to laugh uncontrollably.  The harder I tried to stop, the funnier it got. I am certain that the horse did not find the situation amusing. I speculate that the horse may have been even more upset than the nonagenarian rider. (Yes, that is what a person in their 90's is called. I looked it up).

Then to compound what I found to be hilarious and this is perhaps the key part to the story – the raconteur went on to casually mention that the horse was not dead at all really; it was, apparently, merely stunned by the bullet (perhaps a glancing blow of the miraculous variety) and struggled back up onto its feet to carry on.  Seriously … picture that! And ... all the while the horse is regaining his feet, the Grandfather is looking for his glasses which were broken on their way down. It's funny. Right? (Again – the facial expression was amazingly funny. Everyone at my table was caught up in the story by now and... I was not the only one laughing. Laughter is so contagious. I am surprised that the food curious lady didn't come over to see what was so funny.) All this said... I am reminded, once again, that "things" are most definitely not always what they seem to be ... the horse got up again. Bet he had a story to tell his animal buddies back at the barn.  

I guess there is a lesson in everything. Plus -- I do not know when I have laughed so hard. I still am laughing about it. Laughter is a very good thing. Learning can be fun. By the way – they never found out who shot the horse in the first place.  Apparently, it was a errant bullet that came out of the forest, shot by some hunter with a bad aim or something.  When one lives is this neck of the woods, we have learned to be careful about such things. Poor horse. Lucky Grandfather.

I can figure this out....

 

Mantra to be admired: I can figure this out.  That notion is almost as important as remembering that "A goal without a plan is only a wish". In combination these two things can be very powerful when confronted with a problem or ... with a home repair. The only thing to add is that it is important to trust yourself ... to know that you can figure it out and that you can make a plan to get "it" done.  Then, of course, you need to remember all of that before you call a repairman.

Alas... I did not keep all of this in mind recently when my clothes drier would not turn on.  By habit perhaps, I called the place where I bought it, and was given the name of a drier repairman who had to drive to my home from Timbuktu -- the "cha-ching clock" started ticking when he left his driveway...understandably so.  When I spoke with him on the phone, I told him my analysis of the problem... that the knob was stripped.  He was very patient with me about that and replied with a kind "hmmm". Although he may have distrusted my analysis of the situation -- perhaps rightfully so -- he was a very nice man, came within a week or so and put a new $5 knob on the drier that worked (but looked awful) and charged me $85 for the house call. The whole procedure took about 7 minutes to complete.  He also told me that this knob problem is a common one with my brand of drier.  If only I had trusted myself to just pull the knob off and find a new one online. In retrospect, I should have had more confidence in my initial analysis of the situation.  I mean, after all, I ordered parts and fixed my own oven for years.  But ... that was a long time ago. Actually it is sort of amazing when I think about it -- that was before the Internet and YouTube.  I am impressed with the younger me.  Anyway...

Out of curiosity I did a bit of research after all of this and found my exact drier situation on You Tube as well as several videos of how to "repair" the knob dilemma and info on where to order the new knobs for the particular model of drier that I own -- for the best price.  I ordered the knob so now have one that matches all the other knobs. I am a "matchy-matchy" person as far as knobs on appliances go. What can I say? I am who I am.

The drier works well. Lesson learned.  Be mindful. Trust yourself. Do your homework first. Make a plan. Get it done. You can figure it out. Oh .. and save the repairman for the big problems like when your disposal falls apart under your sink and floods part of your kitchen. Been there, done that.  Appliance repairmen are often worth their weight in gold  -- you know -- to fix the hard problems. Plus they know how to crawl in under sinks, take things apart and put them back together ...  and how to move heavy stuff to get the job done.