Multi-tasking.... hmmm....

Yet another "gift" from the world of the computer is the concept of multitasking. Multitasking is more than reading a good book or the newspaper while you are eating your morning cereal, and I have come to believe that, in general, it is not such a good idea.   We are human after all -- not computers. What I am wondering is how this idea became popular -- how any level of skill in this area has become a goal for which to strive?   When exactly did it become a social imperative to handle multiple tasks at the same time when everyone knows on some level that this is not a good thing? Why do some people take so much pride in their handling of so much at once? I think the whole trend is some kind of plot to undermine the physical and mental health of otherwise healthy and intelligent people. I am sure if I wanted to think about that possibility, I could find someone to blame, but I have too many other important things to do, and for the most part, I plan to handle each of them one at a time. 

I hereby take a stand to multitask as little as possible. Even if I knew how, my Jeep has enough sense not to allow me to program the GPS system or to watch a DVD while I am driving. Actually I am surprised that it even lets me listen to the radio while in gear. Stop and think for a minute -- as human beings we have only two hands. Further -- we cannot answer a bunch of different questions all at once.  If you doubt either of these statements, ask any parent or teacher -- they will tell you I am right in this. We need to focus on one thing at a time. I am staying on the side of "Anything worth doing, is worth doing right" (American Journalist, Hunter S. Thompson). Actually my mother used to say basically the same thing all the time -- as she made me remake my bed, rip out a seam or unravel a row and start over, and I am not even going to tell you how many times I had to clean my room until I got that right.  (Maybe I was trying to do too many things at the same time and thus doing no one thing well  -- multitasking before it even had a name.)

Yep -- There is a definite downside to multitasking.  Second only to causing me to do a poor job on all the tasks I am trying to do at the same time is that multitasking makes me feel scattered. I dislike that feeling. It's like trying to cook a complicated  meal while struggling to make intelligent "grown-up" conversation with other adults while at the same time listening to two grandchildren describing with delight what yucky, maybe dead thing their dog is dragging up onto the back porch at that very same moment. I simply cannot formulate a complete sentence while wondering if the yucky maybe dead thing might end up in the kitchen.  Maybe I dislike multitasking because it also generates a bit of panic along with the scattered feeling.  Sometimes when things are coming at me from every direction I just want to put my legs over the side of my old wagon and drag my feet to slow it down.  So what if I wear out the toes of my new sneakers?  There are worse things that can happen in this day and age. Right?

I think it is important to note that this whole problem is not gender specific. I do, however, write as a woman, mother, grandmother, and all the other "things" I am. From my point of view, multitasking is not always avoidable and sometimes it is even necessary to juggle, to keep all the balls in the air... you know -- to comfort the crying child and to stop the bleeding while you unwrap the band-aide and dig through the drawer to find the antiseptic cream. The thing is -- multitasking keeps the pressure on and that grows tiresome. Remember that Helen Reddy and Ray Burton song - "I Am Woman?" The main lyrics are something like "I am strong. I am invincible"...?  Well --  I am sometimes exhausted.  So it is that I am going to try to be a single-tasker whenever possible  -- except, of course, during the holidays.

Dogs smile. Cats...not so much.

My grandfather had a series of Border Collies all of whom were named Tippy. One of them is the first dog I remember.  He was a streak of barking black and white who herded the cows across the road from the pasture to the barn at milking time and kept the work horses company in the barn. He was serious about his work.  Then as my childhood progressed, I enjoyed the company of a Boxer who did not object to being used as a pillow or to wearing clip-on earrings for that matter. She thought she was a person -- definitely a member of the family. She was wonderful.   A series of cats followed all of which had their own distinct and rather snotty personalities. I loved them too, although I still bear the scars. Add a St. Bernard mix who was the most ill behaved dog I have ever met, an amazing and lazy Great Dane,  a pair of loyal and loving Boxers and a few more cats along with some horses and various other small animals and that completes the list my experience with pets. That summary seems so weak. It totally fails to encompass the joy and friendship they provided over the years. I feel like I want to tell a story about each one. They certainly deserve that. Maybe some other time, some other place.

Some people say that people come to look like their pets as time goes by.  I vaguely remember a humorous commercial or cartoon that portrayed just that.  I am not sure that is true.  I have seen married couples who have come to look alike, but man and beast -- not so much.  Perhaps I say that because I am most fond of dogs that are so ugly they are cute or of dogs that tend to slobber for no reason. 

Now however -- I think that I have passed the point where I want pets around full time.  My last pet has been gone now for a couple of years and I have come to enjoy my freedom from pet responsibilities.  This last pet was born on my living room couch about twenty-five years ago.  I remember the birth well.  That cat never liked me.  She tolerated me living in her house because I fed her whatever she demanded.  Those of you who have lived with a cat know exactly what I mean.  

So one might wonder then why I just had invisible fencing installed in my yard and in part of my pasture.... To me it makes total sense.  I have a dog that visits often and she is not going to get hurt on my watch. She loves her people - my grandchildren. She loves to run. She is part of the family. She smiles. Those of you who have lived with a dog know exactly what I mean.

There's an app for that....

Have trouble making friends or organizing your closet?
Want to learn how to play the sitar or to follow police scanners? 
Need to find info on nearby ghost hunting possibilities or perhaps want to check the McDonald's menu?

It seems that no matter what the desire, interest, or need, there's an app for that.  What interesting times we live in. The words "There's an app for that." are now as familiar or even more so than "Where's the beef?" 

Now that I have figured out what an app is, here are a few questions I have. Who designs apps?  Do you have to go to school for that?  Can you make your own app?  Is there money in doing so? As with so many "techy" things, I am at almost a total loss here.  I sit back and watch. The whole process is amazing.  For example -- in answer to one of my questions -- I saw on TV that one of those, who some might call a workout lunk, hired an app designer to create his own app to demonstrate his muscle building prowess. That he is also showing off his heavily tattooed upper torso and abs, of which he seems to be most fond, is beside the point.  Wear a shirt for crying out loud. (Uh oh  - "I'm sorry.  Did I type that out loud?") -- Apps aside for a moment - I wish him well with his fifteen minutes of fame.  He is young and doesn't realize that not all men can be Jack LaLanne. He doesn't see "it" (the ab to flab progression) coming.  I think we need to give him some room. It's only kind.  I mean -- what happens to tattoos on a body as a person "matures"? Wait a minute -- Is there an app for tattoo removal?  Probably. Never mind -- problem solved. 

....  .... I cannot imagine what else new will happen in the field of apps - probably in the next nanosecond. It seems like just yesterday that I was wondering what .com meant or how the Internet could function without wiring. Hang on everybody... this new app phenomenon is opening up new worlds of which we never imagined. 

Note... my daughter ran across an app that she suggested I consider for this blog entry.  It is called "Ghost in your photos - Prank" and is described as a "Funny joke to insert ghosts in your photos and cause fear and terror". Sounds like fun to me.  It's free, so of course I had to try it.  My grandson and granddaughter, delightful imps that they are, relished the thought of participating and of being the subjects of the photo. My daughter handled all the technology -- of course. Okay -- here's the deal.  We had so much fun.... The thinking was that we would send this haunted photo to my son and to my sister and let them discover, with appropriate horror, that there was a creepy shadowy figure lurking about the children. That's exactly what we did. Then we waited with bated breath for their response. No response from either of them. They just commented on how cute the kids are.  Neither my son nor my sister even noticed the long-haired, spooky apparition.  What a disappointment! Huge.... We had to give hints.  Once he "got it", my son was going to see what kind of reaction he could get from my daughter-in-law and other grandson.  I haven't heard back on that as yet. Not easily fooled -- ever, my sister agreed that cabin fever had set in and suggested that we need to get out more. She's right of course. Is there an app for that?


  

The Selfie

Theories vary on the origin of the Selfie, and I am thinking that I don’t really care where it all started. Add to this that I certainly do not want the background information on the Belfie.  Anyway – as usual I am a little behind (pardon the pun) on all the “latest” whatever…. The point is that I find selfies to be fun and funny on a couple of different levels. I have never taken one, but I might at some point if I can figure out how to do it.

I have done a bit of looking around. I have found that not all selfies are Justin Bieberish – blatantly self-absorbed and sort of sad. Even POTUS has been known to take a selfie – of the group variety. Hmm…that is embarrassing on some level. Yet -- it’s important to note that not all selfies are trying to convince an "audience" that someone is popular, or that contrary to opinion, that the person featured has a life. Sometimes people are just plain having fun and want to share their happiness with friends -- or the world.  That’s nice. It’s fun.

Especially on the funny side of “fun and funny” are those bright bulbs who cannot resist taking and posting selfies while they are committing crimes. Some of their bragging photos have even evolved into selfie videos. What must it be like to be so “into” yourself that you cannot see beyond your own face?  Seriously – those fifteen minutes of fame can be very costly.  They are also funny to those who read about them.  It’s makes the reader feel smart(er).  That’s nice too.

The thing is that like all things “viral”, this phenomenon has developed a life of its own.  There are Selfie Booths, Selfie Poles, and now the CamMe app, the CamMe Photo Booth, The CamMe Fun Shot and, my personal favorite --  Nixie … the wearable drone camera that you can wear like a bracelet so that you can take aerial photos of yourself. It is called a grab-on.  Does anyone else find this to be amazing?  The Nixie grabs-on to your wrist until you need it to verify that you are climbing a mountain or doing something that would warrant an aerial view photo.  You could, for example use it to see the top of your head.  The slogan used by the Nixie folks is “Set your camera free.”  What I wonder is -- how do you get it back?

Sometimes it is all just too much for me. Here I thought I was making huge progress when I figured out how to post a phone photo on Facebook.  Now if I could just figure out how to move photos from my android to my computer so that I could print them more easily or better yet - how to set up my printer to link to a cloud so that I could use WiFi to print from it, I could take a selfie to share my celebration.  Right?  

Just one more thing.... why is it selfie and not selfy? I thought the "rule" was "change the y to i and add es".  I do have trouble keeping up with the latest "trends".  I am thinking that I am not alone in this.  I am thinking that I am in good company.