Don't Do That Again

 "I'm at that stage when my body whispers to me the next day -- 'don't do that again'."   (From Humor is Infectious)

Funny; not funny....  Also accurate.  I have been trying to spend part of each of these "nice" days outside (so rare in Northwest Pennsylvania to have a string of them).  Just once, I would love to have the entire perimeter of my home weeded at the same time.  Just once.  I sometimes believe that weeds sprout on one side as I have made my way to the other side -- within a few minutes.  I am leaving the weeding around yard trees for later.  Hopefully those weeds will magically disappear. One step at a time. Right?

The thing is my whole body does whisper to me the next morning or sometimes by the time I am crawling into bed the very same day.  Not complaining, mind you, just mentioning so that you may not feel quite so alone in this. I do know that I am not alone. I talk to people.  I listen. I watch them lean on their shopping carts in Walmart. Anyway -- I hurt from the fingers on the hand that holds the weeding tool, through my entire body down to my ankles that recently have become rather sensitive to uneven ground. Some mornings, it even hurts to type. Sometimes I swear my hair even hurts.  I am not even going to describe the first few morning steps from the bedroom to the Keurig.  It's pathetic.

I keep telling myself that this is what you get when you sit around too much during the long winters of this area.  This past one seemed especially brutal to me, and I spent way too much time indoors reading, trying to use up leftover yarns by crocheting hats and scarves for no one in particular, and ... watching the boob tube.  Serves me right. I earned this stiffness and soreness.  I should have been more diligent about chair yoga and practicing Tai Chi walking around the house. Cross country skiing is definitely a thing of the past, so that is not an option.  Shoveling is the closest I can come to that and I have taken to using my leaf blower to make that easier.  

Live and learn.... probably not.  

I do, have, however, a rather impressive amount of hats and scarves to donate next fall -- so there is that. (I think it's important to try to look on the positive side of things.)  Then again I have heard that there is such a thing as crochet arm -- very painful.  One must not overdo.

The Klutz Factor...

I am not certain, but I am thinking that clumsiness may be hereditary. My sister and I are "fallers". We have talked about this on more than one occasion. The issue is always there for consideration. We can and do fall for no apparent reason at any time - in any place - with no notice whatsoever. We also bump into things, shut our fingers in drawers, open doors into ourselves, drop stuff (as my niece would say), and are unexpectedly clumsy in general. We live with the klutz factor and have always assumed that we inherited this tendency from our Mom who was a klutz as well.  It was a special bond.  We have laughed about it and ... have laughed at each other.   The three of us always found each other's dilemmas funny in an odd sort of way -- a tie that binds, I guess. Our Mom was always the first to laugh.  She started it.  My sister and I still find each other funny.  It's special. 

A little background -- Our Mom attended my sister's college graduation with a black eye hidden behind large sunglasses as she had opened a car door into her own face. She attended my sister's wedding sporting scabby knees she earned when she fell while playing hopscotch with us a couple of days before the big day -- she was wearing her sandals instead of proper hopscotch footwear.  (We all should have known better than to tempt fate considering our "issue"....)

My sister has real horror stories of embarrassment resulting from this condition -- one story even involves policemen on bicycles.  On a coffee break at a Starbucks just across the way, they witnessed one of her falls and called an ambulance. Seriously - this happened -- a crowd gathered.  She had to deal with zealous paramedics in front of everyone.  I laugh every time I think about it. Am I awful?  On the other hand, I think my most horrific fall was the time I fell while walking in a crowded hallway of the school where I taught. I tripped on nothing while walking with and talking to a student.
I, unfortunately and unluckily for him, had a pen in my hand at the time and ... let's just say although there was ample blood, no stitches were required. (My students did have a tendency to avoid walking with me in the hallway between classes after that.)   I also fell while deplaning in Atlanta once -- I tell everyone that my heel caught on the steps of the airplane.  Of course -- I think her stories are hysterically funny. Mine -- not so much.... I am wondering if she, too, is still hoping that we will at some point grow out of this tendency.  

The thing is -- we have come to accept the situation. We always have soft washcloths, antibiotic cream and bandages on hand. (We own spare eyeglasses.) It is never a surprise to hear that my sister has tripped over nothing and fallen on her face.  I did the same thing just a couple of days before that -- whenever it was. It happens without warning.  Seriously we can trip on nothing, and we fall so quickly that we don't have time to protect ourselves.  Thump....

When I began to write about this topic, I thought that my daughter and niece might have escaped – that the tendency may have skipped a generation.  Both of them disagree vehemently. Wish you could have seen my daughter's face when I brought that up. She thinks that she was born with the factor, but that she has outgrown it somewhat.  I think that is dangerous thinking, but I hope she is right. My niece emailed me from Baltimore that she definitely has the klutz factor and had me laughing out loud as I read about her always having “at least one mysterious, self-inflicted bruise at any given time” and about a fall in front of a busload of tourists who were “milling about”.  I must mention here that she had made it - walking all the way across the Golden Gate Bridge without even a hint of a trip before this happened.  Good job on that!

Now considering the forth generation -- my granddaughter is showing some signs.  I’m not sure.  I will keep a watchful eye on her and can offer understanding and support if the situation continues.   There are worse things for certain. My sister's granddaughter is still in the Toddler stage. She's expected to fall. We will be keeping an eye on her as well. We have experience and wisdom in this area as you now know.